Let’s Talk Inclusion: Food Allergies, Belonging and Being Part of the Room
When we talk about inclusion, we often focus on visible differences and barriers. But for many people, inclusion is also about health conditions, allergies, and intolerances that affect whether they can participate safely in everyday activities.
I have two airborne allergies and three food intolerances, all of which are among the most common in the UK.
Recently, I attended a dinner and social event. The organisers were fantastic.
To ensure my safety, a specially prepared meal was made for me and kept separately. I was reassured that the venue had taken the necessary precautions and that it was safe for me to enjoy the evening alongside everyone else.
I collected my meal, sat with other attendees, enjoyed the food, chatted with friends and colleagues, and joined in with the social activities. In other words, I experienced the event just like everyone else.
A few weeks later, I returned to the same venue for a meeting. Having brought my own lunch with permission, I was finishing it when the catering manager asked why I hadn’t ordered from the kitchen.
After I explained my allergies and intolerances, she began talking about a previous event.
“A couple of weeks ago we had a dinner and social event here. Some woman had made a big fuss about having this airborne allergy and that airborne allergy, so we made her a separate plate and put her in a back room.”
I quickly realised she was talking about me.
She continued:
“But this woman took her plate and sat in the main room with everyone else. She was chatting to people and on the dancefloor all evening. What was the point of going to all that effort if she was just going to be around everyone else anyway?”
I explained that I was the person she was referring to and that I hadn’t “made a fuss”. I had simply completed the dietary requirements form as requested, and had been assured I was safe to attend like everyone else.
She didn’t seem to hear me, and went on to complain that the kitchen staff had been “angry” because they had prepared a separate meal and cleaned a separate room for “this woman” to stay in for the evening, only for her to join everyone else at the event.
I politely explained again – I was the person in question. This time, she heard me.
Before walking away from me, her response was:
“Well, you shouldn’t have come at all if it was a problem.”
That comment stayed with me long after I left the venue.
What struck me most was the assumption behind it: that accommodating someone with allergies was an inconvenience, and meant keeping them separate from everyone else.
But the purpose of an adjustment is not simply to keep someone safe. It is to enable them to participate.
The specially prepared meal was a reasonable adjustment. Ensuring my allergens were not present at the event was a reasonable adjustment. Those measures allowed me to attend safely.
What was not reasonable was the expectation that, because adjustments had been made for me, I should spend the evening isolated from everyone else. Not actually part of the event, but a ghost in another room, listening to the echoes of the event I had paid to attend.
Inclusion is not about creating a separate experience for people with different needs. It is about removing barriers so that everyone can share the same experience wherever possible.
Too often, organisations approach accessibility by asking:
“How do we manage this person?”
A more inclusive question is:
“How do we enable this person to participate?”
There is an important difference.
People with health conditions, disabilities, or any other additional needs are not asking for special treatment. Most are simply asking for an equal opportunity to take part.
They want to attend the event, enjoy the meal, join the conversation, celebrate achievements, and make memories alongside everyone else.
In short, they want to belong.
The lesson from this experience is simple: inclusion is not achieved when someone is accommodated. Inclusion is achieved when someone can participate.
Safety and inclusion should go hand in hand. Food safety legislation exists to protect people with allergies, while the Equality Act helps ensure they are not excluded because of them.
Making adjustments is important. Ensuring safety is essential. But true inclusion means creating environments where people don’t just have access to the room, they are welcomed as part of it.
For organisations committed to Inclusion, Diversity, Equity and Accessibility, that distinction matters.
Because the goal should never be to place people in a separate room.
The goal should be to make sure everyone can be part of the event.
Accommodation is important. Belonging is transformative.
If your organisation wants to move beyond simply meeting requirements and towards creating genuinely inclusive experiences, discover how the IDEA Scheme can support your journey: